Strange emotions make you do weird things
Man.....it's been like forever since I last updated my blog.A lot of things happened, but I'm just too lazy to type it in here......plus, I feel a lil' super extra tired as of late.Anyhoo, I think I better just start with what happened to me today or more accurately the things that have been going on in my mind(and the pile of perverted mess which is my life)....rather than the whole crap I have been experiencing in the last 3 weeks.
How many of us remember our first crush?I'm not talking about the first person you went out with, or the person whom you've slept first with, first kiss...etc. I'm talking about the person whom you've first fallen in love i.e. the first person whose presence made you want to look/stare/drool at him or her just because you think that he/she was the most beautiful and wonderful person you've ever seen.It didn't matter if he or she responded to your affections or not, I'm talking about the person who had smitten you for the first time with the 'love bug'....the 'Mojo baby pill'......'that rainbow feeling'...or whatever the hell the term people use these days.
I remembered my first crush, even till now after a number of relationships(more accurately...FAILED relationships,considering the fact I'm bloody single right now). I was only 13 at the time, more interested in watching Robotech,The A-Team and the new X-Files than the other sex at the time till I saw her for the first time in high-school. She was my senior(a highschool prefect), a year older than me and the first time I saw her past me by, it felt as if time stood still for a few moments and kick me on the gonads....super hard.I won't tell or mention her name but her name starts with an 'S' and whenver(and I mean whenever) ANYONE speaketh that name, I can't help but to turn around and hoping to be able to see that crushie of mine(pathetic aren't I? ^_^; ). She was so beautiful......a Malay teen Goddess with clear beautiful light tan skin, her eyes perfect neither large nor small....just perfect, a killer bod and the most beautiful smile that'd put anything under the heavens to shame.Unlike most of the girls in my shcool...she was not bitchy, superficial and was good to anyone and everyone.She even have the most beautiful Ayanami Rei-like hair which I'm so crazy about even to this day(and this was like 3 years before EVA was released in Japan.I think it was because of her I'm such an Ayanami fan,i kid you not^^).......She was perfect in every way, truly perfect to me anyways. And when she and her family move away, my heart was broken to bits and I felt part of my soul had torn itself from me and followed her.It took me a few months to get over the fact that she was gone from my life.....but every year, I never fail to get a new telephone directory book and look up her name.(I know....me really pathetic.*sniff*Oh yeah....her name was never in the books....its as if she haven't existed)
I regretted a lot of things at the time....like why the f*ck didn't I just go up to her and say hi to her.I've only been in highschool for more than a month when she moved away......and during all that time I did the only thing I could do to her; watching over her and admire her from afar.(Man....I'm scoring a 20 on a scale of 10 at the pathetic-O meter,eh?^^')
Had I go up to talk to her....maybe things could've been different.I could end up as her friend(or more) or at worst be disliked/hated by her(which is fine by me since that'll gave me a reason to hate her and I wouldn't be so "goo-goo-*sigh*-oh-my" with her right now).
I know its no use to regret over the past.....but I just can't help hating myself about it.*sigh*
By now, you're all probably wondering why I'm telling you all this.....well, for some weird reason, fate or karma or destiny(whatever you want to belive or call it), has somehow made her pop out in my life(more or less) after 12 years.I was checking some stuff in Friendster when i suddenly saw her name and picture image in one of my friend's friend list.I checked and re-checked the name and eventhough the image used by her in her Friendster account was not clear......its definitely her, my first crushie.
She's a Business Analyst in some IT company in Malaysia right now and still SINGLE(YESSS!!!!^^).Part of me can't help smiling knowing I've finally found some info on her after all these years......and one of the first thinsg i wanted to do was to send her a message and say HI to her.The thing is....I didn't do so just now(oh boy...its like I'm 13 again and in highschool again).I'm scared...worried....I dunno what to say to her in that message.I can't just type "Hi there, S.Remember me?My name's *BEEP* and we went to highschool for a short time together.We haven't talked before but I was wondering if we could get together and have coffee or lunch or dinner or see a movie or all 4 together at the same time some day?" right? ^_^; (or can I?)
I dun wanna scare her off and block my name from ever messaging her so now I'm at a loss on what to do right now.If there's anyone who have some good advice for, feel free to reply back.If I get some advice and things go well, I'm forever in your debt....and probably name my first-born child after your name*lolz*.
I wanna congratulate my friend Cathy for her excellent performance in a recent cosplay event in the Phillipines.If President Arroyo wants to set up an Anime Gallery in Manila and want to place a 30 feet tall bronze statue of a famous anime heroine at its entrance hall, I'd recommend Cathy(in her Faye Valentine or that HunterXHunter Pakunoda character cosplay outfit) to model for that statue since she's able to capture their image and essence in her own style.Congrats girl, you rock!*Oprah voice* :D
Aside from that....another thing that I want to mention is this.If you have a PS2, go get GTA:San Andreas,The Lord of the Rings:The Third Age and WWE:RAW vs Smackdown.All these game titles are awesome and as a gamer, I think I need to mention that at least once here in my blog.
Till later, love and peace yo.
How many of us remember our first crush?I'm not talking about the first person you went out with, or the person whom you've slept first with, first kiss...etc. I'm talking about the person whom you've first fallen in love i.e. the first person whose presence made you want to look/stare/drool at him or her just because you think that he/she was the most beautiful and wonderful person you've ever seen.It didn't matter if he or she responded to your affections or not, I'm talking about the person who had smitten you for the first time with the 'love bug'....the 'Mojo baby pill'......'that rainbow feeling'...or whatever the hell the term people use these days.
I remembered my first crush, even till now after a number of relationships(more accurately...FAILED relationships,considering the fact I'm bloody single right now). I was only 13 at the time, more interested in watching Robotech,The A-Team and the new X-Files than the other sex at the time till I saw her for the first time in high-school. She was my senior(a highschool prefect), a year older than me and the first time I saw her past me by, it felt as if time stood still for a few moments and kick me on the gonads....super hard.I won't tell or mention her name but her name starts with an 'S' and whenver(and I mean whenever) ANYONE speaketh that name, I can't help but to turn around and hoping to be able to see that crushie of mine(pathetic aren't I? ^_^; ). She was so beautiful......a Malay teen Goddess with clear beautiful light tan skin, her eyes perfect neither large nor small....just perfect, a killer bod and the most beautiful smile that'd put anything under the heavens to shame.Unlike most of the girls in my shcool...she was not bitchy, superficial and was good to anyone and everyone.She even have the most beautiful Ayanami Rei-like hair which I'm so crazy about even to this day(and this was like 3 years before EVA was released in Japan.I think it was because of her I'm such an Ayanami fan,i kid you not^^).......She was perfect in every way, truly perfect to me anyways. And when she and her family move away, my heart was broken to bits and I felt part of my soul had torn itself from me and followed her.It took me a few months to get over the fact that she was gone from my life.....but every year, I never fail to get a new telephone directory book and look up her name.(I know....me really pathetic.*sniff*Oh yeah....her name was never in the books....its as if she haven't existed)
I regretted a lot of things at the time....like why the f*ck didn't I just go up to her and say hi to her.I've only been in highschool for more than a month when she moved away......and during all that time I did the only thing I could do to her; watching over her and admire her from afar.(Man....I'm scoring a 20 on a scale of 10 at the pathetic-O meter,eh?^^')
Had I go up to talk to her....maybe things could've been different.I could end up as her friend(or more) or at worst be disliked/hated by her(which is fine by me since that'll gave me a reason to hate her and I wouldn't be so "goo-goo-*sigh*-oh-my" with her right now).
I know its no use to regret over the past.....but I just can't help hating myself about it.*sigh*
By now, you're all probably wondering why I'm telling you all this.....well, for some weird reason, fate or karma or destiny(whatever you want to belive or call it), has somehow made her pop out in my life(more or less) after 12 years.I was checking some stuff in Friendster when i suddenly saw her name and picture image in one of my friend's friend list.I checked and re-checked the name and eventhough the image used by her in her Friendster account was not clear......its definitely her, my first crushie.
She's a Business Analyst in some IT company in Malaysia right now and still SINGLE(YESSS!!!!^^).Part of me can't help smiling knowing I've finally found some info on her after all these years......and one of the first thinsg i wanted to do was to send her a message and say HI to her.The thing is....I didn't do so just now(oh boy...its like I'm 13 again and in highschool again).I'm scared...worried....I dunno what to say to her in that message.I can't just type "Hi there, S.Remember me?My name's *BEEP* and we went to highschool for a short time together.We haven't talked before but I was wondering if we could get together and have coffee or lunch or dinner or see a movie or all 4 together at the same time some day?" right? ^_^; (or can I?)
I dun wanna scare her off and block my name from ever messaging her so now I'm at a loss on what to do right now.If there's anyone who have some good advice for, feel free to reply back.If I get some advice and things go well, I'm forever in your debt....and probably name my first-born child after your name*lolz*.
I wanna congratulate my friend Cathy for her excellent performance in a recent cosplay event in the Phillipines.If President Arroyo wants to set up an Anime Gallery in Manila and want to place a 30 feet tall bronze statue of a famous anime heroine at its entrance hall, I'd recommend Cathy(in her Faye Valentine or that HunterXHunter Pakunoda character cosplay outfit) to model for that statue since she's able to capture their image and essence in her own style.Congrats girl, you rock!*Oprah voice* :D
Aside from that....another thing that I want to mention is this.If you have a PS2, go get GTA:San Andreas,The Lord of the Rings:The Third Age and WWE:RAW vs Smackdown.All these game titles are awesome and as a gamer, I think I need to mention that at least once here in my blog.
Till later, love and peace yo.
posted by Bluemaxx at
Saturday, November 06, 2004
|
1 comments
